Saturday, February 7, 2015

on the day you would have been born.

on the day you would have been born, i missed you.

i craved you in my arms, tiny baby that was never bigger than a blueberry.

i wondered if you would have had hair or if you would have been bald like your big brother.

would we be celebrating with pink or blue?

would we have struggled with a name? or would we already have it all picked out for your arrival?

today, i am wondering if this will forever be an anniversary or will this day come and go in the future? will your due date hit me hard forever?

on the day you would have been born, your little sibling is almost 33 weeks, nice and cozy in mama's belly. your older brother is so in love.

my little blueberry, you are a blessing. you came, you took lots of your mama's love, and you left us. something was wrong, you were too sick to make it earth side and your tiny spirit made room for your little sibling that we will be meeting soon. I do believe you have a spirit, despite only being eight weeks. you had fingers and toes. you had facial features. at one point, your heart was beating.

on the day you would have been born, i mourn what could have been, but i am thankful for what will be. i am thankful for the almost five weeks we celebrated and knew about you.

it is a hard day, but a day that is met with happiness. soon, your little baby brother or sister will be here because YOU made it happen.

love you, forever, my sweet baby. miss you always.

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